Sincere Thoughts on Being a Mom · Stories About Anna

The October of Twenty-Fourteen

I’m going to be very unpopular here and say that October isn’t my favorite. Maybe it’s because I don’t like pumpkin spice all that much, but it probably has more to do with my emotions and being 39 years old. Last year, I had thyroid surgery on October 14th and the recovery was harder than I expected. I was also self-conscious about the big gross scar in the center of my throat, which OF COURSE I wouldn’t admit to, so I stuffed those feelings inside. No one understood. The universe was against me. I cried a lot.

This year, I got a painful sinus infection. My voice was hoarse for two weeks straight, and my kids seized that golden opportunity to stay out of listening range. And, as you know, my little girl got her ears pierced, our schedule was packed with one thing after another, and we traded in our 11-year-old van that carried memories not just people. Again, I cried. A lot.

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But just like last year, the feeling of hitting my maximum was a gracious warning bell. Not that I was gracious in response, at first. But God pours out His grace even when we “got it under control” but are making our loved ones “miserable.” 🙂 So, when the Fall colors were at their peak, I really paid attention to all that October had to offer. Maybe not the pumpkin spice, but certainly the sights and sounds of changing leaves and crunchy walks in the woods. Just being outside with my kids and taking a break helped a ton. I became – with easy success – a fan of October again.

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I tried to repeat this intention the next day, too. Emmie and I had an afternoon to ourselves and spent most of it on the playground. We were silly, un-rushed, and carefree.

It was exactly what we needed.

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